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The journey of healing is both lengthy and challenging, yet it's easy to overlook when your children also require healing. The life I had built and was proud of had been turned upside down. I chose to repress as many feelings as possible because my then 4 year old daughter needed me more. Yes, I still cried at night and yes I was still distracted in my day to day life. However, when my daugher was around, I tried to focus on her and her million questions. I could see the pain

This is why i write.

I want to start this blog by making it clear that I am not criticizing anyone or anything. This is an inclusive space for everyone, and I am eager to hear your thoughts. This blog will share my perspective on how someone I thought I knew well unexpectedly expressed their wish to transition to a woman, which also includes embracing polyamory. The blog will delve into how this decision affected both me and our young daughter. I am not here to debate the concept of free will or

Have you ever experienced going about your day, without a care in the world, only to suddenly face a divorce you didn't expect after 9 years with someone? No? Good. I wouldn't recommend it. If you were to ask me how my marriage was, I would have said great. I had a home, husband, and child. I had just started going to university to improve the future of our family. We rarely fought. Our marriage was very healthy. Overall, I thought I was going to die with my husband. Over the

Given that my story spans 33 years, I decided it would be best to divide it into sections. The first section will concentrate on my initial traumatic experience at the age of 18: sexual assault. Everyone is taught about stranger danger and the importance of not being alone at a bar, among other safety tips. These lessons are instilled in girls from a very young age. Always stay aware of your surroundings, only be with people you trust, and so forth. I was never a rebelious pe

Poem Title: Fear This world has left me full of fear. Every night I cry a single tear. The pain I feel has overwhelmed. The isolation shut me down. The need for contact keeps me alive, but how much longer can I survive? It has been 15 years since I was sexually assaulted, a traumatic event that forever altered the course of my life. In those early days, the weight of my emotions felt unbearable, as if I were constantly being pulled in every direction by a tumultuous storm of

The deceit, falsehoods, suffering, and heartbreak that have woven themselves into the fabric of my past are not merely passing shadows; they are profound experiences that have shaped who I am today. Each lie told, each act of betrayal, has left its mark, carving out deep valleys of pain and confusion in my heart. The emotional turmoil I endured was intense, filled with sleepless nights where I replayed every moment, searching for understanding and clarity. The weight of such

Why can't I breathe? Why can't I see? Everything seems to be surrounding me. I need to run. I need to hide. Everything seems to be following me. I'm breaking down. I'm hurting inside. Everything is just too much for me. Date: 2010 Author: Ashley Above is another short poem I wrote while trying to process emotions. I needed to be strong because I didn't want anyone to see I was hurting. I covered my pain with smiles and pushed myself beyond my limits. Limits I ignored. If I st

Caving In An empty shell, that's all that's left. The isolation has taken over. The pain, fear, and hate are so strong. I'm alone in the world, and it's caving in. Above is a small paragraph I had written in 2010 after I was sexually assaulted. I was struggling every day, so angry that I was pushing everyone away. Being alone felt better because no one was looking at me with sadness in their eyes, but I was alone with my thoughts and anger. Everyone around me didn't know how